The Bounce Back Mentality (Part 2)

Bam son!

This is Shoot It Straight, the podcast where life blessings don't come sugar-coated and excuses get bitched.

Coach Jim Clayton: I'm Randy Black, podcast guy, professional question ask, and apparently the only one here who doesn't yell bam!

Coach Jim Clayton: And son in public.

Well, we're working on that, Randy.

I'm Jim Clayton, coach, mentor, motivator, and the guy who still thinks a whistle may be the best motivational tool known to man.

Coach Jim Clayton: Each week, we're taking what Jim's learned from the course.

Coach Jim Clayton: The drills, the discipline, the drive, and translating it into real-world success.

That's right.

This ain't just about basketball.

It's about showing up when life press is full court.

It's about pushing through when the clock's ticking down.

Coach Jim Clayton: If you're looking for

Coach Jim Clayton: Well, you might just want to ride the bench.

We're here to help you believe bigger, achieve louder, and motivate strong.

Coach Jim Clayton: So buckle up and whatever you do, keep shooting it straight.

Coach Jim Clayton: Bam, son

Coach Jim Clayton: Welcome back to Shooting It Straight.

Coach Jim Clayton: I'm Randy Black, joined by my co-host, Jim Clayton.

Coach Jim Clayton: And we are in the Sports City U Studio in Hurricane, West Virginia.

Coach Jim Clayton: And we are glad that you are here with us today as we continue our conversation

Coach Jim Clayton: on one of the most powerful traits that a person can develop resilience in our last episode we kind of laid out the groundwork

Coach Jim Clayton: We talked about what resilience really is, not just bouncing back, but bouncing back stronger.

Coach Jim Clayton: We unpacked how setbacks can actually set the stage for you for some comebacks

Coach Jim Clayton: And we shared some examples from our own lives of what it's like to grow through adversity.

Coach Jim Clayton: Today, though, we're going to dig in a little bit deeper.

Coach Jim Clayton: We're going to start by answering a really big question, and that's can resilience be taught?

Coach Jim Clayton: Then we're going to talk about the things that that kind of get in the way of our ability to bounce back.

Coach Jim Clayton: And then finally

Coach Jim Clayton: We'll look at what mentally strong people do differently.

Coach Jim Clayton: These are practical takeaways you can apply in your life, in your leadership, and even in your relationships if you want to.

Coach Jim Clayton: So whether you're coaching, you're competing, you're parenting, and I know that one well, Jim knows that one well, or you're just trying to keep moving forward, this episode's for you.

Coach Jim Clayton: So let's get to it.

Coach Jim Clayton: So first off, Jim, I'm going to ask the question.

Coach Jim Clayton: The big misconception that people have about resilience is that

Coach Jim Clayton: It can't be taught.

Coach Jim Clayton: It can be taught.

Coach Jim Clayton: It can be taught.

Yes.

And here's the thing about you're not born with it.

Mm-hmm.

Okay, because when you're born, when you when you think about young kids

You think about this.

And I just, it just happens every day at my house with my grand my granddaughters, four and six.

Right.

And we did the same thing.

I'm tired

Oh, it's okay, honey.

Sit down, take it easy.

So there pretty soon they start to believe that, man, if I just say I'm tired

I'm going to get this.

So it's kinda like the same thing.

You program your mind to think one thing when really gonna come a point in time where I don't care if you're tired.

We don't quit when we're tired, we quit when we're done.

Get up and let's keep going.

Well they're not used to that.

Okay?

Yeah.

So the other thing is to learn how to be resistant, resilient, you have to be intentional

Okay.

This is not something that just magically happened.

Okay.

It's not something that happens by accident.

It happens through experience

And, you know, when we talk about resiliency, most of the time when you're bouncing back from something, something's happened in your life that you're just not

really like it.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

Okay.

Whatever that is.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

Okay.

I'll give you a classic example today.

Today.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

Okay.

I went and had a PET scan.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

Well, luckily, I know some people in this town.

And I'm kind of one of these people that I don't want to worry about it.

Just tell me straight up what's going on.

Because we talked about this certainly in the first episode.

If I know what's going on, I can get a game plan.

Coach Jim Clayton: Exactly.

And then I can work my game plan and execute it, you know what I mean?

And I can get the outcome I want, hopefully

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

But it's not gonna be from trying.

You don't always get what you want, but you gotta make sure that you're giving us your best effort.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

Exactly.

In our camp this week, I told someone our campus had two things.

A coach, teacher, parent should not have to do.

They shouldn't have to worry about your effort or your attitude.

And those are two pretty big peels.

that coaches, teachers, and parents can't get together.

Mm-hmm.

They can't get that right.

Their efforts are terrible and their attitude's bad.

And then when you try to fix them, then they're having a pity party.

It's always your fault.

No, it's not my fault, it's your fault.

Okay, so you know you gotta look at it like that.

But I told I told these kids, I said, you know, when things happen bad

Things aren't going well in the game?

Not making shots?

Not doing this.

What are you gonna do to flip it?

What are you gonna do to turn it around

And it all starts between your ear.

Mm-hmm.

It's that brain of yours.

And last time I checked, thinking is a skill too.

And a lot of people just underthink.

So, now I said today, I'm going to get a pest camp.

So my doctor calls me on the phone.

I said, hey doc, what's going on?

Well, I knew it was gonna be one way or the other.

So he goes, well, he goes, things are growing a little bit.

Things are getting not bad.

But they're not going in kind of in the direction we want.

Well at that moment, that ain't really what I wanted to hear.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Oh, I can imagine.

And anybody who's had that, they they know what I'm talking about.

Okay?

So I said to myself

Okay, well, what do we got to do?

And I asked him a couple questions.

Well, we're gonna do this, we're gonna try to do this, we're gonna try to do it, and we're gonna work on it.

I said, okay, I got you.

I gotcha

Okay.

Now I could have sat there and gone boo-hoo crap.

I mean, you know what I mean?

Not what I want to hear, but I go, okay, I knew tonight

We were coming in here and we were going to work on the foundational truths of resilience.

I said, well, big boy, it's time for you to swallow a little bit of your own advice.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yep

And that's what I did.

And that's how my attitude changed towards that.

And so I got here.

And of course I told my wife, I told my son, and so my son gave me, he gave me, he gives me two quotes.

Bible verses.

And I can't tell them to you exactly yet because I never really heard these.

And he said, I want you to keep these in your car.

I want you to tell yourself these every day.

Said, I got you.

So I didn't see them, and they were in my car.

So I look at one, I'll share them with you later.

Okay.

You know them.

And

I'm gonna do it.

Because I know God's looking out for me.

I know there's a higher power looking after me because I've done too many things in my life to kill myself that He didn't let me let happen.

So I know He ain't done with me

He's just testing me.

He's making me see, okay, what are you going to do about it?

It doesn't matter what happens to you.

It just matters what are you going to do about it?

And so I said, okay.

So I got up here to Sports CDU and I've been researching a few things on my own, trying to be like the play doctor.

Okay.

So I called my doctor.

Now, my doctor, young lady, I had her in school night now.

Coach Jim Clayton: Okay.

But her she has a twin sister.

They're both doctors.

And her dad was a science teacher at the old Kamak where I went to school.

So I think I said, when you get a minute, give me a shout.

I got a question for you.

It wasn't 30 seconds.

She's on the phone.

You know, I'm thinking, man, I wasn't really expecting to call back that quick.

She says, man, when I saw that, I'm calling you back right now

I said, well thank you so much.

So we had a great conversation.

She said she's gonna do some things.

She's told me I need to do some things.

Already done them, sent them to her, the balls rolled

Now you know again I I that what I heard today is not exactly what I wanted to hear.

But I'm not gonna let that brew in my day.

Coach Jim Clayton: Exactly.

Because I'm having a good diet.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

I don't like PEP scans, especially at twelve o'clock.

Yeah.

'Cause you can't eat.

Right.

You know, from ten o'clock at night till

So I'm kinda a little hungry right now, but I'll get over it.

I'll get over it.

I can eat when I get home.

Like I said, I'm not worried about it.

I'm more I'd rather be here than eat.

But that's the big thing.

Okay?

You're not born with it, but you can intentionally develop it.

But not by being pitiful.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

By being powerful.

Okay

So, how do you get powerful?

You don't let little things get you down.

Most of the things that we really truly worry about

They never happen anyway.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah, I can agree.

But we just let it consume our energy.

The sound that brings you down.

And I don't turn that on my radio.

That's just not coming on my radio.

I'm not listening to people bring me down.

I got other things to set to hear and do.

Okay.

I'm not interested in

Talking about the negative, I want to know the posture.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

And the world today, and you I I know you agree with me 100%, it's just so negative.

Coach Jim Clayton: Oh, definitely.

And people feed off the negative.

Coach Jim Clayton: They do

I and you are not one of those people.

Coach Jim Clayton: I I do I I try so hard every day to make sure that I'm not being that negative.

Coach Jim Clayton: But it's easy to do.

Coach Jim Clayton: Oh it is.

Coach Jim Clayton: It's so easy to fall in that trap.

Coach Jim Clayton: Especially with social media and everything and the instant gratification that's out there.

Coach Jim Clayton: Oh if you if you want to have what you're thinking reinforced, just get on Facebook.

Coach Jim Clayton: Just get on Twitter or X or whatever it's called now.

Coach Jim Clayton: And you'll find a way to get it reinforced.

But you know, the thing is, through all that crap that's on there, there are really good people.

There are.

And so I sent out a little thing to ask, you know, I'm having this.

You know, I said

You know, life is precious.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

And you better learn how to celebrate every second of every day.

Especially when you get older like me.

You know, you start to see all the things where they say, you know, you better you better think about that when you're thirty, forty, fifty but you don't.

Mm-hmm.

Because you think, oh no, you know, I got time out.

I got plenty of time.

Well you don't know that.

Right.

Nobody knows that.

The expiration date on your life card, only one guy knows that.

And I ain't it.

So I'm making taking advantage of everything possible.

No regret.

And so, you know, that's my thing, is you can cook that little pity party off your shoulder, gone.

What do I gotta do to fix it?

Let's go.

Now when you're in that fix it mode and when life throws your curveballs

Here's what you need to know that most people don't know.

You're in a growth bug.

You are growing as a person.

You are getting better.

People think, how am I gonna do that?

You think it's the other most people think the opposite.

Well, not the really successful

They're thinking opportunity to get better, to grow, to get tougher skin, a little bit thicker skin

Okay, and that's what people gotta get.

You gotta let that thing be like a chest armor and it just bounces off of you.

Give me what's your best shot, baby.

Come on

Bam!

Bam!

Come on, bam!

You ain't touching it.

Coach Jim Clayton: You say that you say that and immediately the thing that I think of, kids are little and they're the I'm rubber and you're glue.

Coach Jim Clayton: That old saying it immediately it's it's it's what pops in my head.

Coach Jim Clayton: I just imagine the stuff just bouncing off and and going out of the way and getting out of your you know it's it's not gonna it's not gonna bring you down.

Coach Jim Clayton: You're not letting it you're not letting that stick to you

Coach Jim Clayton: You're sending it on its way.

Put that armor on, put that chest on there and go, bam, bam, hit me with your best shot.

Come on.

Because it ain't working.

Then pretty soon after a while they realize it's not working.

And guess what?

They quit.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

They quit doing it.

They move on to the next target.

And I'm not your target.

You ain't gonna hit me.

So a setback today, you already said this earlier, I'm gonna turn it into a great comeback.

Now it ain't gonna happen today.

But the plan's in place.

But it is happening mentally.

It's already happening up here.

I'm not gonna let this get me down.

Right.

God, I know you're looking after me.

I know you're testing me.

I know this is a test.

This is I know you got something up your sleeve, baby.

And I'll figure it out.

Just give me it, just give me a little time.

And I'll bounce back bigger and better than ever.

And that's what you gotta do.

So to wrap it up in that, you can't teach it.

Okay.

But you gotta be around people that can teach it

If you're around somebody who's feeling sorry for yourself, guess what you're gonna do?

You're gonna mimic that person.

So how do you teach it?

Well

You really teach I'll I'll teach you everything, myself personally, through story.

Okay.

Story.

Stories about what I've gone through.

Stories about what other people have gone through.

I listen to stories every day.

And I listen to people.

Every day I do this.

Have a time set in the morning that I do this.

People that are in way worse situations than me.

Health-wise, all that other stuff.

And I listened to them and their stories of how they overcame it.

Mm-hmm.

And I'm going, wow.

May you know and I share those stories.

So I taught school.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Everything's a story.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

Coach Jim Clayton: Oh I taught history.

Coach Jim Clayton: I made sure everything was a story of history.

Coach Jim Clayton: The students can grasp it so much easier.

Oh absolutely.

So I do that every day.

You know, and I share that with people.

I send it to people every day.

You know what?

Every time I send it to my friends, a video, thanks.

They sent a thing back.

Man, thanks so much.

I really needed to hear that today.

Now that just took me five seconds to do that.

Now, like I told you, it mo it hit me

So when it hits me like pow, bam, yeah, I got that 24 hour rule.

Now the 24 hour rule is this

When something moves me like that that I can share to help other people who are down in the dumps trying to look for a bounce back mentality, I got 24 hours to share it

Or I ain't sharing it.

Yeah.

It'll go dead.

It'll go dormant.

I'll forget about it.

And I'll never get a chance to do that.

And I do it because if you help one person bounce back

Maybe they'll use that to bounce back a second time.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

And a third time.

And you can't bounce back two times till you bounce back once.

Coach Jim Clayton: Exactly.

Okay.

You can't have ninety-two podcasts without having a third one.

Oh yeah.

Okay.

So the it's a step.

It's a procedure.

It's the idea.

Coach Jim Clayton: It's the idea.

Coach Jim Clayton: It's an idea that it's that I saw in your notes

Coach Jim Clayton: And it's that you're not gonna be good the first time.

Nobody is.

Coach Jim Clayton: But that's when the resilience starts.

Coach Jim Clayton: You keep pushing forward.

Coach Jim Clayton: You've got to get better.

Coach Jim Clayton: You've got to bounce back off of it.

That's when the growth happens.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah

The CPU don't think about growing.

They're thinking about losing, going backwards.

I said, I'm not interested in regression.

I'm interested in progression.

I don't want to regress.

I'm not interested in activity.

We got enough of that crap going around every day.

I'm interested in productivity.

Coach Jim Clayton: A lot of people are afraid

Coach Jim Clayton: to fail.

Coach Jim Clayton: Oh God.

Coach Jim Clayton: They they they see failure as not just a setback, but as an end.

Coach Jim Clayton: And it's not.

Coach Jim Clayton: No.

Coach Jim Clayton: It goes back it goes back to the fortune growth.

Coach Jim Clayton: It goes back to that fortune cookie that I keep talking.

Coach Jim Clayton: I've talked about for years now.

Coach Jim Clayton: Failure is feedback and feedback is the breakfast of champions.

Coach Jim Clayton: You take what happens from that failure and you use it to grow, to get better.

Coach Jim Clayton: And I I told students this all the time when I was teaching, you know, they come in and they're

Coach Jim Clayton: They get their tests back and they're like, uh man, I failed this.

Coach Jim Clayton: This is horrible.

Coach Jim Clayton: I'm like, it's not horrible.

Coach Jim Clayton: Because you're going to look at it.

Coach Jim Clayton: We're going to take the time.

Coach Jim Clayton: You're going to go through, see what you got wrong, fix it.

Coach Jim Clayton: So that you still know the information.

Coach Jim Clayton: You're looking it up and making sure you can do it.

God told me this a long time ago.

He says sometimes failure is just a better way to begin again more intelligently

Yeah.

And I said, man, that's it.

But here's the big thing.

If you want to know something about failure, here it is.

This is the no the nugget of nuggets on failure.

Failure is an event.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yes.

Not a person.

And see, everybody takes it personal.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: It's not.

And here's the other thing about failure.

It's not the opposite of success.

Mm-hmm.

Failure and success run side by side by every day

Of every week, of every month, it never stopped.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

It's infinite.

It just keeps going.

And you can't have one without the other.

That's exactly right.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

And that's what people just

They don't know that.

So therefore they can't think that.

Yeah.

That's why we're here.

Mm-hmm.

Sharing it.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

We didn't invent the whole world.

You know, there's some just phenomenal people out there.

And here's the last thing I will say on this.

You ever notice when I Google something about positivity, all of a sudden I just get tons of positivity stuff?

It picks it up in the algorithm, whatever it is.

And all of a sudden, man, I'm getting quotes.

I'm getting stuff from all these people, man.

It's awesome.

Yeah

So if you do negative, guess what you'll get?

You'll keep seeing the negative.

The same thing.

So the bottom line is it's on you.

Yeah

It's always gonna be on you.

It's on your mom, your dad, your coach, your teacher, your grandpa.

It's on you.

Mm-hmm.

And that stuff

that's learned early or not learned, it doesn't matter when you learn it.

Right.

It's just that you learn.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

And if you want to learn that, you better learn to get around people that got it down to a sign.

Yeah.

And they'll teach it to you.

Coach Jim Clayton: That's why I like hanging out with you, Jim.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Same here.

I always yeah I mean you speak way above my head

When you're talking about technology and all that stuff, woo, you leave me in the dust every day.

But that's hey, that's not my thing.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

That's your thing

And that's why you're the best at it.

And that's why I'm, oh man, I'm just blessed to have you sitting here with me.

Coach Jim Clayton: This episode of Shooting It Straight is sponsored by the Sports CDU Basketball Academy.

Coach Jim Clayton: Looking to level up your basketball skills.

Coach Jim Clayton: Whether you're a young player just learning the game or a high school athlete aiming for the next level, Sports City U Basketball Academy in Hurricane, West Virginia

Coach Jim Clayton: Is where your journey begins and greatness is built.

Coach Jim Clayton: From private sessions and skills camps to team development and advanced clinics, Sports City U offers a range of programs that fit your goals.

Coach Jim Clayton: I've got a quote I want to read.

Coach Jim Clayton: Okay.

Coach Jim Clayton: And I'm I'm not going to tell you who it's from, but you're going to know real quick who it's from.

Coach Jim Clayton: But it fits in so well with what we're talking about with resilience and failure and growth.

Coach Jim Clayton: Okay.

Coach Jim Clayton: I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career.

Coach Jim Clayton: I've lost almost 300 games.

Coach Jim Clayton: 26 times I've been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed.

Coach Jim Clayton: I've failed over and over and over again in my life.

Coach Jim Clayton: And that is why I succeed.

Coach Jim Clayton: And that is who?

Michael Jordan.

Coach Jim Clayton: Michael Jordan.

Coach Jim Clayton: That is the uh the perfect example of someone who who gets it, who understands what this concept is.

But see what separates guys, I had a opportunity

Years ago, back when Michael Jordan was in his heyday with the Chicago Bulls, with the all those championships, I was invited, because I would speak at Nike, to speak at his camp.

So I flew in there

Spoke at his camp six or seven hundred campers.

There he is leaning against the back of the pad under the mask.

So I finished talking.

He walks up to him.

Says now

Coach tell me what you was talking about about that.

He's talking about his left hand.

About this.

I said this.

He goes, could you show me that?

I'm thinking like, really?

Like I'm not gonna show like that's not an hour.

Let me get my shoes on

So he gets his shoes on.

We start doing it right there.

And it was like I'm like kicking myself, pitching myself, going, Am I really like

What are you really doing this?

Is this like real?

But what separated him and really all the great players that I've coached have been around teams is their attention to detail.

And we'll talk about detail right here.

Yeah.

Okay?

Gotta pay attention to the little thing.

Because if you don't pay attention to the little things, don't worry about the big thing.

Yeah.

And the best things in life.

They're not things.

That's what I say.

Yeah.

They're not things.

But yeah, Michael Jordan, how many times has he missed?

But he wasn't afraid to what?

Coach Jim Clayton: And go for the next one.

And so when he got cut off his freshman team, Langley High School.

Instead of going home with his mom blaming the coach, calling the coach, setting up at me, he says, well, if you want to make his team bad enough, you're just gonna have to go work harder.

Mm-hmm

And uh obviously um It worked out pretty well.

Uh he did.

Worked out pretty well.

Like I said, I mean the the the the experiences I've been to dinner with him, I've been I you know, it it's just i i it

But but watching him and listening him talk and watching him work out, then seeing him in games, because I saw him play in games when I was doing some stuff with the New Jersey Nets, now Brooklyn Nets.

They played the Bulls.

I was sitting around on the bench

I saw all kinds of stuff.

But again, they all bounced back.

Those guys, now you talk about tough skin

They don't watch that crap on TV.

They don't listen to what those people say about social media.

They're laughing all the way to the bank.

They ain't here sending all the bit who cares what those people say.

Right.

They do not control what he does.

Yeah.

And just so you can't let other people control you.

They're not your steering mechanism.

You got your own

Steering wheel, baby, and it's up to you to keep your car between the line.

Yeah.

And that's what people don't do enough of.

Coach Jim Clayton: There's there's always

Coach Jim Clayton: in in in life stuff that kind of gets in the way a little bit.

Coach Jim Clayton: Gets in the way of of resilience.

Coach Jim Clayton: So what what might be some of the like common

Coach Jim Clayton: Kind of barriers we see that might prevent someone from from being resilient or even developing resilience.

I would say the first thing, the biggest thing, self-doubt.

Because you doubt yourself.

When you doubt yourself, then you start to crumble.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

So you can't doubt yourself.

You gotta know what you're capable of doing.

Can't be afraid to do it.

Okay

And you gotta go do it.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

Well, to bear g have strong that strong gut, you know, just that that confidence, okay

You gotta go through some tougher times.

Now all of you, ever everybody's listening, has had great times where they've been very successful.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

So sometimes you gotta go back to that that moment and you gotta revisit it.

What did I do to get to that point?

Okay?

Well I did this.

Well can you do that right now?

Absolutely.

Absolutely.

So self doubt's a big one.

Don't don't doubt yourself, okay?

Okay?

The other one is

Don't listen to others.

Okay.

Oh don't listen to people that are going to give you tell you exactly what you want to hear.

I gonna tell you what you want to hear.

I'm gonna tell you what you need to hear

So I I did a video the other day I saw it pop up.

Oh, it says, I don't look at you the way you are.

I look at you the way you could be.

That's just me.

So I'm not going to take average or below average.

I'm not going to take that out of you.

Because I know you got better than that in you.

Well see, that's a teacher

and a coach, and a mentor, and a motivator that knows how to do that.

The majority of people do not know how to do that.

Yeah.

They don't want to know how to do that because they like the pity part.

And when you're in when you're in a pity party and all that stuff, what do they always do?

It's always somebody else's fault.

Always putting the blame elsewhere.

Oh yeah.

Negative on that big daddy.

Mm-hmm.

You know whose fault it is?

The person that you brush your teeth with every night staring back from the mirror.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yep.

That's you.

Okay?

Now to get people to to do this and bounce back, oh except people.

I told you earlier it's called the law of the mirror

People see what people do.

So be the example.

The positive example.

Yeah.

Now people that are on the other side of that, they can't stand here.

But you know what I'll say?

Two words.

Who cares?

I ain't worried about them.

I'm not giving them one second of my thoughts.

Yeah.

I'm guarding my time

And see, that's that's just how I look at.

And those are probably the two b the biggest things to hold people back, I think.

Coach Jim Clayton: There's probably a lot more.

Coach Jim Clayton: Do you think do you think sometimes it might be that people are just they're taking on too much?

Oh a hundred percent.

Can't be great at every can't be great at anything if you try to do everything.

Yeah.

So you gotta figure out what you're gifted

So I told this to my class one time.

One of the last things I said to him when I was retired.

I said, all of you in this room have a gift

You have a special thing about you that nobody else is ever going to have.

Well, God raises his hand.

Coach, yeah, I hear you.

Well how do I know what mine is?

Great quest.

Great question.

I said, well here's how you know.

You ready?

Pretty simple

Ask me this question.

What are you good at?

That requires not much effort.

Well, I'm good at tearing down an engine.

Cool.

Okay.

I could do it blindfold.

Well, let me tell you something right now, Big Daddy, I can't.

And I don't want to.

Okay?

Is there a profession for that?

Yeah.

What's it called?

Mechanic.

Now there's various forms of that.

Could be a foreign car mechanic, could be a nuclear bechanic.

I say, well

Can you go learn how to do that?

Yeah.

Could you make a good living doing that

Well, maybe.

I said there's no maybe about it.

Yeah.

Everybody is looking for a great mechanic.

Well, I already know what you're gonna do.

Alright now.

Mm-hmm.

Now I don't really care if you go to college and learn how to diagram a sentence.

That is not you.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

That's not true.

Waste of time, effort, energy.

And remember, we can't get that back.

Right.

He goes, I never really thought about it like that, coach.

I said, well, that's the problem.

You never thought about it.

You gotta think it before you can do it.

Well nobody's ever said that to them.

I said, well, they have now.

Well how do I do that?

Well here's what I do.

I go get me a mechanics ASC certified mechanics certification and I go work for somebody and I watch how they run their business.

And watch.

Odds are one of your friends gonna do it with you.

Learn everything you can.

Everything about it.

Save your money

My dad always said, best time to save your money is when you have some.

I said, save it.

Go buy your truck.

Rent a van.

Get your stuff.

Come up with a cool nickname for a business.

If you don't know, call me, I'll get you one.

Put it on, slap it on the side.

There's your name and highlights

Go down the road, baby.

Make it happen.

Yep.

Because when people's cars break down, they ain't happy.

Ruins their day, ruins their week, everything.

And guess what?

You're the fixer baby.

You're the one that's gonna make them smile, and and the best thing at the end is they're gonna pay you and what you're worth.

They're gonna be happy, you're gonna be happy, and you move on to the election.

Coach Jim Clayton: That's that I mean, uh you know, it's a great example.

Coach Jim Clayton: That's what paid my way through college.

Coach Jim Clayton: It was my dad.

Coach Jim Clayton: My dad is a mechanic.

Coach Jim Clayton: That was his trade.

Coach Jim Clayton: And they own their own he and my mom.

Coach Jim Clayton: We they own the business and they've done they've done well and it it it it paid for my undergraduate college.

And that's not me.

No, I I'm not them.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

That's not you.

Coach Jim Clayton: It is not.

Coach Jim Clayton: Well you're kind of a mechanic of the computer.

Coach Jim Clayton: I've I've I've I've shied away from it because it was I well, I was in high school.

Coach Jim Clayton: My dad looked at me, he said, Look, I don't want you to have to do this.

Coach Jim Clayton: I don't want you to have to work this hard every day of your life.

Coach Jim Clayton: He said, I want you to get an education.

Coach Jim Clayton: I want you to do something that you love, something you enjoy.

Coach Jim Clayton: Because he doesn't like working on cars.

Coach Jim Clayton: He just never enjoyed it.

Coach Jim Clayton: He did it because it's what his dad did and he learned from his dad what to do.

Well that's And it's that's the best teacher.

Coach Jim Clayton: So he's you know, he was always in the mindset, find something you love to do and let's go do that.

Coach Jim Clayton: He said, And wherever you want to go to school, whatever you gotta do, we'll pay for it.

Coach Jim Clayton: Make sure it's taken care of.

Coach Jim Clayton: You know, but his skill set of being able to do those things made that possible for me.

Coach Jim Clayton: Absolutely.

Coach Jim Clayton: So I I totally understand it.

Well, my skill set of teaching, coaching, owning a business, traveling, speaking

What's that done?

That's paid away for my kids.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yep.

That's not what they do.

And I they don't have to do what I do.

You figure out what your you know what's your gift.

And so at the end of class we all come up with a

I never even thought about that.

So well go home and figure that out on your own.

Come back tomorrow.

Tell them what your gift is.

And it might be more than one thing.

Then you have to decide what it is.

Or maybe you could take that one thing and branch it into multiple things.

Whatever.

But we all have them.

And sadly.

We don't take the time to to figure out what it is and we look back and go, man, I wish I woulda, I wish I woulda, I wish I woulda.

I said, Well you're captain of the coulda, woulda, and shouldn't team

That's the most overcrowded team in America.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah, I I kinda you know, I look at this as we talk about it, and it's kind of the idea that resilience, it's it's it isn't just about

Coach Jim Clayton: pushing harder.

Coach Jim Clayton: It's more about, you know, sometimes you gotta slow down.

Coach Jim Clayton: We gotta recover.

Coach Jim Clayton: You gotta get clear of everything.

Coach Jim Clayton: Patience.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yes.

Coach Jim Clayton: Patience.

Coach Jim Clayton: 100%.

Coach Jim Clayton: You're right.

Coach Jim Clayton: Patience.

Coach Jim Clayton: And it's you know, and that's it goes back to what we've talked about before with the idea of instant gratification that we see today in our society.

Coach Jim Clayton: So our culture today

Coach Jim Clayton: discourages real resilience.

Coach Jim Clayton: Because you're not giv you you're not given that opportunity to bounce back from things.

Coach Jim Clayton: It immediately hits you and it's time to move on to the next

Coach Jim Clayton: And it's not it's not growing from it.

Coach Jim Clayton: It's just well this happened.

Coach Jim Clayton: Here's what happens next.

Coach Jim Clayton: There's no there's no learning in it.

Oh you're a hundred percent correct.

You're a hundred percent correct because

The greatest things in life don't happen overnight.

Right.

And the the world we're in is hit the button, get what you want.

Uh-huh.

Hit the button, get what you want.

But you see, it doesn't make a difference what you do, whether you get what here's my bottom line to it.

I don't care what you do

Still you should have the same mentality.

Work hard.

Yes.

Okay?

Overdeliver

Make somebody's day better because of you.

Because it's all about you.

It's not about me.

It's about what we can do for others.

Exactly.

That's that's the whole thing.

What can we do to help?

See, like I told you.

It's we won't let you 'cause it's what about me?

What about me?

What about me?

What about me?

Mm-hmm.

Well, what about we?

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

There's powers in numbers.

One's a lonely number.

Coach Jim Clayton: Exactly.

And if you do it all by yourself and you're less successful, who do you got to share it with?

Nobody.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

Well, that ain't fun.

And what's every day?

Every day should be fun.

I have fun every day.

Now my definition of fun might not be your definition of fun.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

But it doesn't matter because I'm not you and you're not me

But I have fun every day.

I did something fun every day.

You know, I went to the hospital today.

I saw people I haven't seen well, how you doing?

How you been every day?

Nicest people, you know what I mean

One of the little ladies that did my thing, she's from Sis and Feel, oh she's just a nice and sweetheart.

So I've seen you in a couple years, you know.

I said, Well, that's a good thing, ain't it?

She says, Well, yeah.

So we laughed, carried on, you know, I mean I mean it was just how you deal with people.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

And uh, you know, when you make them feel important, it's a whole nother issue.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: And people don't do that.

Coach Jim Clayton: It changes the mindset of the people around you.

That's it.

Mindset.

What's that?

That's the second part of what?

A and bam.

Mm-hmm.

Achieve the right mindset.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yes.

It's all about that.

Open or closed.

It's gonna be open or closed.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah

And people that have been doing thing a long time, they're more have to have a closed mindset.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yes.

I have the opposite

'Cause I'm a little weirder.

Mm-hmm.

The older I get, I w I own it.

Well, but give me some new stuff.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: Come on, show me a new way.

Coach Jim Clayton: Show me but show me another path to get me there.

Uh uh I uh you know, I I didn't say I must I might like parts of it, I might not like every piece of it, uh but I'll damn it

That's all a game of it.

Resilience is like adaptability.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

You just learn how to adapt situations.

Yeah.

And you learn 'em through trial and error.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

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Coach Jim Clayton: And that's that you know it kind of takes us on with the idea of what do the p mentally strong people, these people who have

Coach Jim Clayton: taking the time to to learn and be resilient.

Coach Jim Clayton: What what you know what is it that they do that's so different?

Coach Jim Clayton: And when I looked through your notes and things as I was preparing stuff, you listed some habits there

Coach Jim Clayton: of resilience that I thought were pretty interesting.

Coach Jim Clayton: And that first one is master the pause.

Coach Jim Clayton: What do you mean by that?

Well, sometimes everybody wants to hurry into everything.

Sometimes just take a deep breath, pause, sit back, and absorb it.

See when you absorb stuff

You kind of get into more of a self-reflection.

Yeah.

So you think it you see it.

It's visualization.

See it happening before it happens.

So what I always do is I say, give me the visual

of the best possible outcome.

And I get this visual in my head.

So that's pretty nice.

Give me the visual of the worst.

possible outcome.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Don't like the way that looks.

I ain't liking that one.

Okay.

And so

You know when you just step back and take a breath, mm-hmm instead of jumping into everything real quick, and then you're in a hurry and you don't think it through, you know what I mean?

And

Because no thinketh, no doeth.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

It's all thinking.

And so everybody today is in rush, rush, rush, hurry, hurry, hurry, get there faster.

Well, if you want to get there faster, why don't you just start out a little sooner?

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: I say that all the time.

Coach Jim Clayton: Oh yes, it's kind of dri I'm driving and people are going 90 miles an hour on the interstate and I'm like, leave earlier.

Coach Jim Clayton: Seriously, if you're in that big of a hurry.

Oh my gosh.

And you know the old thing Murphy's low.

Mm-hmm

When what can go wrong will go wrong when you're trying to press.

Yep.

Okay?

Because you didn't prepare, you didn't start out.

You weren't on time.

Uh-huh.

And time, you know what I mean, you can speed it up, slow it down, do whatever

You get there faster, you pass that guy by the next red light, he's right there with you.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

But but see that's just the culture that we live in right there.

And people don't know how to sit back, reflect, pause, enjoy the moment.

Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: And that goes into the next habit you've got listed there.

Coach Jim Clayton: with the idea of and I'll let you kinda kinda explain what this means to embrace solitude.

Yeah, sometimes you gotta go get by yourself

You gotta have me time.

Private time.

Okay?

And you got that's where you reflect.

That's where I write things down.

Okay.

Now that comes to me.

I do it every day at almost the same time.

Yeah.

Sometimes longer than others.

And I always write stuff down.

Sometimes I'm longer on it.

Yeah.

Because it's hitting harder.

Coach Jim Clayton: See that and you know for me, like w when when those ideas hit me

Coach Jim Clayton: And like like I'm working on a I'm working on a podcast and and plans for things and those ideas hit me.

Coach Jim Clayton: My place to do my notes is I take my ideas, I throw them into a tool like ChatGPT.

Coach Jim Clayton: And I use it to collect those ideas and start building things and crafting it together.

Coach Jim Clayton: And it's, you know, it's but it's my time on my own taking those concepts that I

Coach Jim Clayton: getting in my brain those those ideas I want to talk about, the things I want to share, and then building it up from that.

And when you when you're thinking about that, I'm I'm not that technologically advanced on the chat GPT stuff, but I'm hoping one day

You're going to teach me how to do that better.

Because it'll probably make my life easier.

But my system, you know, my always thing is, uh, I write everything down.

If you if you don't if you if you don't know it, you can't write it down.

Yeah.

Try to write it down.

It helps me remember.

Now sometimes I can't read my notes.

Mm-hmm.

But, you know, somebody said, well, you should just record it

Well I probably should.

But I still what?

I got stocks and stocks and stocks and pages and pages and pages pages.

Notes everywhere.

When I'm gone, somebody goes through those notes.

It's hard to tell them what they'll find

Hard telling.

You know, I looked at something the other day I wrote ten years ago, I go, Oh man, I remember writing that.

Yeah.

But I let ten years go by and I've never used it again.

Mrs Mrs.

Coach Jim Clayton: Clayton and the kids are gonna have fun going through this stuff.

Oh my gosh.

Coach Jim Clayton: Well I'll tell you I'll tell you we'll go through it.

Well be my daughter.

Now she'll go through piece by piece and she never throws nothing away.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

Coach Jim Clayton: She'll collect you told me she's she's the one that's pushed on you to

Coach Jim Clayton: to to do certain things.

Coach Jim Clayton: To get your get your thoughts and your ideas out there for people.

Oh yeah, she has definitely and she calls, checks on me every day, you know what I mean?

All that stuff.

She loves to Louisville.

And, you know, it's just

You know, like for her it's just a different mindset 'cause she doesn't see me every day.

Mm-hmm.

Well she calls me every day.

Or I call her every.

You know, and uh but yeah, you gotta have some quiet.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah

You gotta control the clutter.

Mm-hmm.

And boy is ever.

Yeah.

All the time.

Always just beats you down.

And you sit down and you go

Man, I'm like mentally worn out.

Well, mental, I told my so he said, I said mental is the physical is four is to one.

Uh-huh.

Mentally tired

is way worse than being physical.

Coach Jim Clayton: Well it it it it goes back to your four pillars we talked about on the last episode.

Coach Jim Clayton: You know, mental requires clarity.

Coach Jim Clayton: Woo.

Coach Jim Clayton: It requires that you have to be ready for these things to happen.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: And most people are.

And, you know, it it's just, you know, the mental side of it is so huge, but it's always overlooked.

Uh-huh.

And it's in the details.

That's a detail.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

That's a detail.

Coach Jim Clayton: And it cut, you know, and the next item you've got there on that list of those habits goes right along with what we've already talked about with this whole idea of

Coach Jim Clayton: this instant gratification and getting certain things is the idea that you don't chase approval.

Coach Jim Clayton: You don't go after it.

Yeah, that's the biggest oh my gosh.

I don't care what you think about.

Coach Jim Clayton: Uh-huh.

The most important thing is what I think about.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

And my goal every day and your goal every day should be

All I'm worried about is that at the end of tomorrow, I'm going to be a better version of myself.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: And that would be- Did I did I stay true to myself?

Yes.

Okay.

So I ain't listened to I always told God the other day.

I said, if you don't like me

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

You don't really know me.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

That's just how I look at it.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, I'm not going to bearish you.

I'm not going I'm not going to do the things that cause people to not like me.

I'm not like that.

That's not my thing.

I'm going to find a pastor.

Because that's just how I roll.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

And you know, I'm just telling you, I'm not, I'm not see people that are seeking approval from others, they don't have a real good self-concept of themselves

Right.

They don't really have confidence in their build.

Okay?

That's why they suck into what everybody else is saying.

Oh man, you do well I don't care like this.

Take it to myself

Well what are you doing?

Yeah.

If I even if I even go there.

Most of the time I don't even let that happen.

So somebody says, well that guy whatever

It rolls right off your back like water in a shower.

Mm-hmm.

But see, some people can't they they take it everything personal.

Mm-hmm.

Coach Jim Clayton: They take it nothing.

Coach Jim Clayton: They they have to please everybody

Coach Jim Clayton: And that's impossible.

Can't do it.

Can't do it.

You're never gonna please everybody.

Coach Jim Clayton: Exactly.

So give it up.

Okay?

Just give it up.

Cannot it's like I said, you can't do everything, can't please everybody.

You gotta know what you gotta do.

You gotta break it down, be specific, reflect on it, put a plan, execute the plan, and get the result

That's really what it all comes down to every day.

So he asked me, what's your plan?

What was your plan today when you woke up?

Um that tells me a lot when I was hearing that word.

Um have a mission

They'd have a mission.

And next thing you know, 24 hours has gone by and the day's gone.

And he can't get it back.

I told him about my camera set this week.

I said, there's gonna be a uh

Yeah.

And by the way, what day's that on?

They do it.

But you know, sometimes when I'm talking to those little guys, you know, high school, middle school, they look at you like

You're speaking like a foreign language like oh my god they never heard this stuff and I just go You gotta be kidding me

No.

Well, you heard it now.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: I mean I I I think I think back to

Coach Jim Clayton: the first time I met you.

Coach Jim Clayton: And that's kind of the way I, you know, with what you were saying.

Coach Jim Clayton: Like I can't remember exactly what you were saying, but the impression I got was, I've never heard some of this stuff before.

Well here's the thing on that.

People won't always remember what you say.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

But they'll always remember the way you make people.

Coach Jim Clayton: Exactly.

Bam.

So I'm just telling you, that is the golden knock.

Coach Jim Clayton: I mean, I I mean I mean look at it.

Coach Jim Clayton: That was

Coach Jim Clayton: you know, twenty years ago or thirty years ago.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: And it had an impression on me that when I got the chance to start to get to know you

Coach Jim Clayton: I was excited because I remembered how it made me feel hearing you speak.

And the truth is, I don't remember what I said either.

Yeah.

But

Guess what?

I got it in my notes somewhere.

It's probably and it's there because I write everything.

I don't ever go in with something without preparation, what I'm going to talk about

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

I always have it down.

That's what keeps me calm.

Mm-hmm.

Knowing I'm prepared.

Coach Jim Clayton: So we got two more habits on your list.

Coach Jim Clayton: And this next one.

Coach Jim Clayton: Like when I read your heading for this head for this one, it kind of hit me for a second because I was like, wait, what now?

Coach Jim Clayton: And it's use pain as fuel.

Oh, yes.

No pain, no gain.

You've heard that right?

So how does that make you feel?

Pain can be described in a lot of ways.

Like a physical

Like you feel something physically in your gut, your arm, your leg, whatever.

Or it could be like a pain in the You know what that is.

Yeah.

Okay, two different types of pain

Alright, so you know if it's a pain, if it's a pain like a hurting pain, something's caused her.

There's a root cause to everything.

I don't care what you do, something's caused her.

So you gotta figure out what it is

To stop it.

You don't figure out what it is, it's gonna keep going.

And that's the same thing with handling the pain.

Okay, stop it.

Okay?

Pain.

You know, sometimes

The room, all the room in America is at the top.

Sorry, at the bottom.

The bottom's the most overcrowded place in America.

The room is at the top.

And to get there, you gotta take steps.

And when you have pain, the pain could be physical pain, could be mental pain.

I can't do it.

This is too hard.

Comes back to that self-doubt again.

See

Mm-hmm.

But you gotta say, man, I got this.

Yeah.

I gotta push through this.

I gotta get it done.

I gotta have a positive attitude.

I gotta be, I gotta, you know, I g I I got that my positive attitude, I gotta be intentional.

Yeah.

P-A-I, and then now, not tomorrow, now, P-A-I spells what?

Bang.

That's how you get through it.

Gotta be now.

Coach Jim Clayton: I mean it's it kind you know it's it's it's like the idea of you you have to turn the breakdowns into breakthroughs.

Coach Jim Clayton: You know, it's r the pe these people that we're you know, people we're kinda using here talking about, you know, it's they grow where other people are quitting.

Coach Jim Clayton: They keep pushing, they keep going forward.

That kills me.

And here's why.

Some of them are half inch from getting there.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

That's like running 28-mile marathon and getting to the finish line and stop it.

That ain't happening.

Yeah.

I'm crossing that line

Because it that is most people can walk twenty eight straight line.

Yeah.

I couldn't now, but I mean there was a time I could run it, but you know, it's like you can do

Way more than you think you can.

So as a coach and a teacher sometimes, people when they're younger, they're getting pushed.

A hand was in your back.

So just about the time, you know what I mean, you thought she was gonna quit?

Uh huh.

We're going a little bit further, Big Daddy.

Yeah.

But see, as you get older in life

That hand disappear.

Or it's still there.

Mm-hmm.

And people go, ah, that's good enough.

I can't stand up.

That means average.

Oh, that's good enough.

I'll get it tomorrow.

Well,

Huh.

Tomorrow's not a day and guess what?

Tomorrow ain't promised to nobody.

Yeah.

Maybe you will, maybe you won't.

And you know we talked about this.

The longer you wait to put it off, the less likely it's ever gonna happen.

Yeah.

It's called the law of in of of intens of inten the law of int intentional intent.

So if you put you gotta be intentional to get get through it.

And if you don't, it's gonna stop.

Dead instructs.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

That ain't gonna happen.

Okay?

So all these things we're talking about, you'll notice how it always comes back to the same word.

Yep.

And if you control that length,

Between your ears.

You control everything out.

But it takes a while to get that.

Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: And it you know, and it the we we get to it and we got one last item on that list of habits, and it kind of

Coach Jim Clayton: It it goes with what you just said in a way.

Coach Jim Clayton: And it's the idea of ruthless focus.

Coach Jim Clayton: And what you wrote on your notes, and what I've got jotted down on mine, is that you guard your time and your energy.

Oh my.

That is the biggest thing.

Oh man, is I'm blind.

Because people every day are trying to steal your energy and your time with worthless crap.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah

And I'm not interested in it.

I'm not gonna let.

So you've got to learn how to guard against those types of distractions.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yes.

So I don't allow them to happen.

So allow that.

If I let you in the door, kinda like playing tennis.

I hit you the ball and you hit it back.

And I hit it back and you hit it back, the point keeps going.

Yeah.

If I hit you the ball, or you hit me the ball and I don't hit it back, the point's over.

Yep.

That's how you gotta deal with it.

Points over.

I'm not gonna go tit or tat with you right here.

Bang, bang, bang, back and forth, back and forth.

Because then what starts out kind of one way ends up what?

in a negative way.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Not going down that road, not gonna happen, ain't gonna do it.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

And that's the big thing right there.

So you gotta guard that.

And you gotta put that guard up there and say, Nip, knock, knock, who's there?

Not answer.

You know it's like certain people call you and you'll pick up the phone.

Yep.

Other people call you.

Yeah, do I really want to answer?

I'm picking up that phone.

Yeah

If they really want to call back they'll leave me a message.

Or send me a text.

Yeah.

Then I'll read it, then I'll decide.

Right.

So I can't call everybody back.

I'll be on the phone

24 hours a day.

Not that I don't want to.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

But some of them, you know, if it's important, they'll leave me a message.

If it's something I really like and it's positive, guess what?

Call them back.

Yep.

Oh waste my time.

Remember I told you I don't waste my time.

Oh well I can't tell you that yet.

Coach Jim Clayton: Well, it leads right into what this next thing is.

Coach Jim Clayton: It leads right into my favorite segment

Coach Jim Clayton: Jimmy's Wisdom of the Week.

Coach Jim Clayton: Now it's time for Jimmy's Wisdom of the Week.

Coach Jim Clayton: This is where Jimmy shares one of his famous Jimmyisms to inspire the listeners.

Coach Jim Clayton: So this week's wisdom of the week, you said it to me before we started, and you almost gave it away.

Coach Jim Clayton: Oh, almost had the spoiler there.

Coach Jim Clayton: with people that waste your time.

Coach Jim Clayton: Hundred percent.

Hundred percent.

I'm not gonna let you in.

You're not getting in.

I'm not gonna waste my time.

And everybody can relate to that statement.

There are people in your time, in your life, that are just gonna take your time.

And you're not gonna get anything for it.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

Waste of

Coach Jim Clayton: Yes.

That ain't him my vo I just ain't do it.

Not gonna do it.

Have I done it before?

Hundred percent

I'm sure we all have.

We all we all do.

We look back and go, man, that was a big I didn't get nothing out of that.

That was just a pure waste time.

But guess what that was?

That's a learning situation.

That's a growing situation.

So the trick is learn if you the first time you make a mistake, it's a mistake

You learn from your mistake.

The second time you make that same mistake, it's a choice.

And it's what we are.

We all are our choice.

Yes.

Every day, every second of every year, every month, forever.

We are our choice.

Yes.

But again, it comes down to this.

People know it when you say it to them.

But it's not embredd in their brain, which means they don't know it.

Because they're not practicing

And actions speak a whole lot louder than word.

But what are people good at?

Sitting behind that phone with that thumbs, word word, word up.

Oh, they'll talk crap behind your back.

Coach Jim Clayton: Keyboard warrior.

Coach Jim Clayton: The people who sit there and they'll say all these things and post it on social media or

Coach Jim Clayton: They'll send a message to somebody knowing that I don't have to look in the I don't have to look them in the eye and say this, so I'll just say whatever I want.

Coach Jim Clayton: The keyboard warrior.

It's so funny.

When you start out, people will say, Who are you?

Well when you get really good at something, they'll go, How are you?

Coach Jim Clayton: Yes.

Big difference in that.

Coach Jim Clayton: See?

Because they look at you a different way.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah

Okay.

So I look at the people now that go, man, when you started this 33 years ago, that wasn't gonna work, it's not gonna work.

Well

I see him now and they go, man, that was the greatest idea ever.

I mean I knew it was gonna see I already know that.

I don't need that pat on the back to know what I've done

I just look at all the all the memories, all the things that walk out.

And I always tell you my goal every day.

Every day.

Still a goal today when I walk out of here.

Or am I better walking out?

Than when I walked in.

Now I take that personally for me and I share that with the kids.

Are you a better player walking out than he walked in?

Yes.

And you know what you call that?

Successful that.

Mm-hmm.

And the most successful people in the world, they take one, turn it into two, three to four to five, six, seven.

Turn into a week.

Four weeks turns into what?

A month.

Twelve months turns into a year.

And they just keep the cycle going.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yes.

And it never stops.

Coach Jim Clayton: Never stops.

It's kind of like compound interest.

Coach Jim Clayton: Mm-hmm.

When it's working for you.

It's great.

It's a beautiful thing.

Coach Jim Clayton: Well, it's working against you.

Oh, Lord Almighty, son.

It ain't that great.

Right.

So what are you gonna do about it?

That's the end of the conversation.

So don't let people distract you.

Don't let people steal your thunder.

Don't let people tell you what you can't do.

Okay, because can't is just another word for lazy and most people that can't do things, they don't want to do them because they're lazy and they just pick on the people that can't.

Coach Jim Clayton: Right.

And don't let that happen.

Just don't turn that dowel on your radio, W-E-A-K radio, the sound that brings you down.

And we ain't going down

We're going up because why?

That's where all the room is.

Coach Jim Clayton: Exactly.

And when I get to the top and I'm not there yet, boy, I hope I'll see you there.

Coach Jim Clayton: Nice.

Coach Jim Clayton: So real quick, let's recap real quick what we've talked about today.

Coach Jim Clayton: Um these are from my notes here.

Coach Jim Clayton: So it says uh what I've got here is that resilience isn't

Coach Jim Clayton: just a natural trait.

Coach Jim Clayton: It's something that can be developed.

Coach Jim Clayton: It can be strengthened over time.

Coach Jim Clayton: A lot of that is through experience, through learning, and through intentional practice.

Coach Jim Clayton: You have to build it up

Coach Jim Clayton: Uh resilience, though, it it can be undermined.

Coach Jim Clayton: Uh if we stretch ourselves too thin, if we lose sight of who we are.

Coach Jim Clayton: If we neglect those foundations that we've built to keep us strong, the you know, the things that we talk about in those four pillars, mentally, physically, socially, and spiritually.

Coach Jim Clayton: we can uh easily undermine what we're doing.

Coach Jim Clayton: And the good news is that mentally strong people have habits that we can all adopt.

Coach Jim Clayton: From learning to pause under pressure, choosing uh solitude over the noise, uh pain as motivation, and and focusing on what truly matters.

Coach Jim Clayton: Those are the things that can help us to learn to be resilient, to develop that resilience.

Coach Jim Clayton: So here's what I want our listeners to do, Jim.

Coach Jim Clayton: I want them to pick a habit from the show today that they want to strengthen.

Coach Jim Clayton: Okay.

Coach Jim Clayton: And I want them to take a step toward that this week.

Coach Jim Clayton: Then I want them to head over to our website, shootingitstraightpodcast.

Coach Jim Clayton: com, and leave us a comment about what they did

Coach Jim Clayton: on the post for this episode.

Coach Jim Clayton: And if they want to go straight to that post, they can head to shootingitstraightpodcast.

Coach Jim Clayton: com slash zero zero three.

Coach Jim Clayton: And that'll load right to the post for this page.

Coach Jim Clayton: So put a comment there.

Coach Jim Clayton: Let us know what steps you've taken this week in trying to grow and be resilient.

Coach Jim Clayton: 100%.

And don't be afraid to do it because there's no wrong things.

I don't care what it is.

Okay?

I don't care what it is.

We would love to see it

We'd love to reach out to you, help you.

Maybe we can share something with you and give you a different twist on what you're doing, give you a different outlook, okay?

And take you across the finish line.

But if you don't reach out

I can't reach back.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

So that's the big thing.

Okay?

It's like when I send messages to players, excuse me, what do you think about this?

And they send a heart button.

That one that was a question which required an answer.

I didn't know what to say, Coach.

Well, it's a question is opinionated.

There's no right or wrong answer.

Right.

Your opinion is valuable

It's very valuable to us.

I want to know what you're thinking.

Tell me.

Always trying to get better.

Well, coach, maybe if you think about this one, and that's awesome.

I'm going to write it down

Just like Randy said, he's a keyboard a keyboard warrior.

I wrote that down right here.

I've never heard that before, but boy, that's a good one.

Okay, so again, share it with me.

It's always sharing, learning, growing.

Podcast, opportunity.

That's what we're here for.

Coach Jim Clayton: Yeah.

Coach Jim Clayton: So on our next episode, we're gonna have Jim uh share uh a story.

Coach Jim Clayton: He's gonna open up about one of the most defining moments of his life.

Coach Jim Clayton: when as a teenager he broke his neck, and how that life altering injury became the foundation for his resilience and the future success he's had as a coach and a leader

Coach Jim Clayton: So please come back, join us on the next episode of Shooting It Straight.

Coach Jim Clayton: And I'm Randy.

Coach Jim Clayton: I'm Coach Jim Clayton.

Coach Jim Clayton: And we hope that you have a fantastic week.

Coach Jim Clayton: If you've enjoyed today's episode, make sure to subscribe, share it with someone who needs a boost, and follow us online at shootingitstraightpodcast.

Coach Jim Clayton: com.

Coach Jim Clayton: That's where you'll find every episode, updates, and more.

Coach Jim Clayton: You don't win alone, in light or on the court.

So surround yourself with people who pass the ball and speak the truth.

And always remember, keep shooting it straight.

Bam, son.